Down-to-reality relationships after the age of 20?

I wonder what's with all the girls searching for long lasting relationships that have a perspective for more these days. My friend Linda has had MANY boyfriends, she seems to be tired of dating at the age of 19 already, saying shes searching for something longer lasting. Shouldn't girls still only just be having fun at clubs and flirting with guys? I actually don't think so. I never enjoyed flirting with random guys I don't know. They've got nothing more than a stare from me. But then again I think I somehow became the same. A girl that has had numerous boyfriends and even her real life relationships only lasted 2 and 3 months, has begun to date guys for 6months 8 months and 7months real life far relationship. Overlooking everything and staying in the relationship even if I wasn't really happy or completely head over heels in love. Also I have ALWAYS dated guys that completely dedicated themselves to me and loved me more than themselves, who adored me and would do ANYTHING for me. With anything I mean anything. But then this one guy, he would never be like that. He would never promise me future or act that he wants to be with me forever. On the opposide, he was feeling suffocated by me wanting him by my side 24/7. A thing that all the previous guys would be honestly incredibly happy about. I wonder do I wanna have the perspective for a possible future at too young age? He's been 6years older than me, I'm 19 now. Isn't that an age when you should start thinking about more than short flings? But me, 19 is too young to think about a guy for lifetime and spending future together. Why was I so horribly trying to prolong all the relationships that weren't working. Arguing day in day out and a 'break up sign' was always floating over those relationships. Why stay with them, what do I have to lose. What am I scared to lose?

Maybe it's the thing that I go into every relationship with the thought that I will spend all my life with them, not thinking about break up was even an option. A childish thought maybe for this century, but I think it's that what makes a difference between the Dreamy-relationships I have & the Down-to-reality-relationships other have.

Maybe I was trying to prolong the relationships because I couldn't admit to myself that a guy can't possibly fall in love with me as much as I wish him to? That he maybe WOULDN'T do anything to keep me? It's a selfish thought I know, in a world where women desire emancipation from men, they still wanna be treaten as princesses and treated out to romantic lunches. That's what we have from all the feminism. Guys r no longer knights in shining armors and girls r no longer princesess from birth. So is it our fault? 10-20 years ago people were marrying at the age of 20. Like my mom and my grandmom too. But nowadays girls don't hurry into marriage anymore? Or do they? I think its very split now. One of my friends is marrying next summer. She's younger than me and the guy is 27...After 1 year of dating he proposed to her and their marrying. I guess there r couples who KNOW they want to spend the rest of their lifes together after just a couple of months? Yet I was dating half a year and I can't even get the feeling that I'm loved. Is there something wrong with me? Or is it the guys nowdays? Maybe I'm just too unlucky? Or is it wrong to go into the relationship and act as there won't be anyone else ever again?

Starting to feel like there is no pattern in what I'm writting, but thats probably because I can't sort my thought's properly. Thing's r just randomly crossing my mind so I'm writting them out. Still a bit confused if the last break up was due to happen or if not. But one thing I know that if the relationship only lived on me feeling that I'm sacrificing everything I wanted and desired, then there was smth wrong. (I wonder how many girls r willing to date a guy that can't express himself into words OR actions? Who can't say anything more than a mild I Love You. Who lied to them to keep them, even if they were unhappy the way thing's were. Like that they would still have some faith, but that would just end crushed as soon as the truth woul come out.)Nor did I really felt loved nor was I head over heels in love. Just as he would never act as I was the one, I never started to act as if he would be the one. Why dedicate urself to someone who is too scared to dedicate himself to you? It's a one way road that would end really sad. It's me who kept the feelings low, exactly because of this. Like this I at least won't be too hurt by his selfish and stubborn behaviour. No more at least. Now it's time to find someone who will love me MORE THAN HE LOVED HIMSELF & think about me MORE than he thought about himself.